GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
