She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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