he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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