so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
