Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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