Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
