Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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