you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
