I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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