He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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