I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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