whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
