It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
