she was so not down for the gang bang
im six kinds of drunk right now
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize