so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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