hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
