it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
