Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
