I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I have fence marks all over my body
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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