Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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