Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
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