My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
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