we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
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