OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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