It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize
