Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
