it wasn't lemon gatorade
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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