I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Alive.
So much puke
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
If I had your ass I would rule the world
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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