just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
