Taylor Swift is so right about you.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
My vagina just recognized that song.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Randomize
