Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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