I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
