margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
