Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I will pee on everything he values.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
