Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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