dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
