end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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