Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
