Screwed.edu
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
