dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
