Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
