The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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