Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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