i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Randomize