I can't watch pbs sober anymore
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
