I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
