Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
It's Friday. Sex?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
