Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Randomize