Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
