lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize